Time to Speak Your Truth
I’m so proud of my friend, Andrea Costantine, that I just have to blog about this!
It is rare to come across a book or piece of work that is so very raw, real, and inspiring. That is why I have decided to participate in sharing this work with you today.
Today is the launch of her book, Speaking Your Truth: Courageous Stories from Inspiring Women” – a powerful anthology of which I am an advocate for.
Speaking Your Truth has 49 stories for women by women. These stories are heart-wrenching and inspiring. The stories are based on love and healing, family matters, spirituality and much more.
Here are some things people have said about this book:
“Speaking Your Truth sizzles with brave energy. These amazing stories are a powerful testimony to the strength of human spirit, and a source of hope to all.” Sharon Lippincott
“Read one of these stories and you’ll keep turning the pages for more.” Susan K. Elliott
“The courageous stories of these women proves that there can be triumph over tragedy. What an inspiration to read their remarkable stories of resiliency in overcoming difficulty.” Danielle Waagmeester
“Speaking Your Truth is like a bowl of grandma’s soup on a cold day.” Sara Ortiz
Find out more now and order your copy today of the Speaking Your Truth anthology. Get your copy (and perhaps a copy for a friend, your mother, or a colleague) here.
If you choose to support her, and get courage to speak your own truth, awesome! Thank You and Congrats ahead of time!
xoxo
Kim
Letting go of what others’ think
The Next Premium Membership call is on Monday, August 23, and it’s all about how to let go of what other’s think.
Let It GO! How to let go of what others’ think…and start living your life, your way
Obviously, to keep the world running smoothly, and to not throw us all into complete anarchy, we have to care what other’s think to some extent. But I’m not talking about manners, social norms, or cultural rules. That stuff is fantastic, as a common courtesy for your fellow human beings.
I am talking more about the deep down, dark, scary “stuff” that you need to show in order to fully be you. You know, the light that you want to shine, but feel it’s silly, new agey, off-the-wall, and will send your close family and friends running for the hills shrieking “Witch!”
All kidding aside, you know exactly what I mean. It is important to understand that by shading that light, you are hiding a part of the real you, and you will always feel like something is missing. On the Premium Call, I’m going to teach you the exact process for letting that go.
Whether it’s the Law of Attraction, believing in angels, thinking you’re psychic, or letting people know that you believe there is a God, (which can be hard if you’re the intellectual, analytical, academic kind) you don’t have to fear what other people will say if you let that side show.
Fear is a human construct, with 2 exceptions: we are born with the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. EVERYTHING else is something we have absorbed from others or created for ourselves. And it isn’t the fear of the actual “thing” that scares us…it’s the thought behind the thing.
You’re not afraid of telling people you believe in angels and that they guide your life and keep you safe, you’re afraid of the thoughts you have created thinking you know their anticipated responses. Sounds confusing, but it isn’t really.
For example, I am terrified of snakes. To the point where even seeing them on TV makes me squirm. Sometimes I close my eyes and tell my husband to let me know when the scene is over because they just give me the heebie-jeepies. Ick. I can’t even stand thinking about them now, as I write this!
BUT, it isn’t the actual snake that I’m afraid of. If that were the case, seeing the snake on TV would not elicit any response from me. My rational brain would tell me that there is no actual snake in front of me, and that I am safe. Therefore, I’d have no fear of snakes, except when they were in front of me…which is…never!
However, my brain has a “story” about snakes that it tells itself: They’re creepy, they’re slither, they appear in unexpected places, they surprise the heck out of you when you’re walking through the grass, they will pop up and bite you.
Again, the only snakes in my part of the world are small and completely harmless unless you’re a bug of some kind. They’re good for the environment, and I haven’t come across one in years! Yet, I still have a “thing” about them.
You have the same “thing” about being you. You have a story you are telling yourself about what others think, and what it will do to you. The problem with this, is that you know that you need to be you. In order to fulfill your hopes, dreams and goals — to be happier, healthier and wealthier, you KNOW that you need to release this fear.
I can live with my fear of snakes because I rarely see them and they do not affect my ability to be happy in life. I could not live and be happy while being afraid of what people thought if they see me as new-agey and woo-woo by my fairly conservative neighbors, family members and friends...and so I let that fear go! It still pops up, (hey, I’m not perfect!) but I have found a way around it, a way that I wish to share with you.
I can live my life, my way…and be happy! And so can you.
So in this members-only, Premium Call,
I am sharing:
- 3 ways to identify if someone is holding you back in life (and what to do). I have a feeling you know this already, deep down, but I’m going to dig it up for you and remind you of it!
- A 5-Step Strategy for letting go of what others think, without cutting out everyone in your life! (no sense being YOU, all alone!)
- The 2 teeny-tiny little words that will COMPLETELY empower you to change how you view everything! It’s absolutely the most freeing phrase in the English language!
And I’ve got way more information and cool techniques for you!
Join us NOW or check out more information about the Premium Membership over at http://kimberlyenglot.com/membership! (Join us NOW and get access to 3 months of Archives in the private forum AND set your inaugural status BEFORE the price DOUBLES in October...never pay more than your current monthly price)
Catch you on Monday!
I’m Not living up to my full potential!
Byron Katie is a very loving soul, can’t you just feel it?
In this video, she helps a man through some self-sabotaging beliefs and I have a feeling that he’s not the only one who’s ever worried about this!
Identifying Self Sabotage part 3
Here is the third part of the 4 part Installments I promised.
Part one: “Self doubt and Limiting Beliefs”
Part two: “Fear/worry”
3. Shame/Guilt.
“I’m not worth it.” “I’m not a good person if I put myself first.”
They’re both the same thing and they’re both related to fear. You are telling yourself that you don’t deserve success, health, wealth unless everyone else around you has it too. You are trying to control everyone else’s happiness, which is impossible. What you focus on you get more of, so if you are trying to make everyone ELSE happy you will end up making them happy and you will be drained and overwhelmed.
Another example: You want more money. So you are focusing on having MORE money, which really means you don’t feel like you have enough. So you are actually focusing on NOT ENOUGH…which brings you situations where you feel lack and not enough. Make sense?
Guilt makes you feel selfish for wanting more. Guilt makes you put other people’s needs and wants ahead of your own. Guilt keeps you tired, old-looking and sick.
If you find yourself continually putting someone else first, you are sabotaging your success. If you can find the money to put your children in yet another art class or on a sports team, you can find the money to join a yoga retreat, just for you. Don’t let the guilt of not giving everything to everyone else prevent you from enjoying your own life.
Guilt is a HUGE waste of the present moment. And it’s a really bad habit (like paying for something over and over and over again). Pay once and let it go!!! It can be tempting to just not bother, after all, you’ve survived this long, right? But if you’re interested in thriving, not just surviving, if you need extra help identifying your limiting fears my Mindset Makeover will help.
Right now add the the Mindset Makeover to your cart for $147. Or choose the $30 5-Pay Option
The $30 5-pay option is for those of you who still have money concerns. (5 pays for this kind of product are unheard of, but I never said I followed the crowd 
) but the 5-PAY is ONLY available until JULY 21, 2010. After that, you can no longer pay for it in installments. Learn more about this HERE.
I know you’re going to love this! Between the action guide (that covers the entire Master LIFE Cleanse program) and the 3 teleseminars you are going to flip at all the unique (and simple) ways you can identify your limiting beliefs and leave self sabotage FAR FAR behind you! Add it to your cart now, before you forget and get started on this process immediately!
Your Daily Dose of Joy!
I’m on another happiness-theme kick, mainly because I am about to wrap up the third (of four) installment in my How to Be Happy series for the Premium Members.
All this happiness is good for my health and I am always looking for ways to share how I do it, with you! I can’t remember exactly what I was reading earlier this week, but something caught my eye and got me thinking about finding your joy!This is not the first I have written about joy. My blog, podcasts and articles are full of “how to be joyful” tips (and I wrote How to Live a Joyful Life specifically specifically for Aspire Magazine’s May/June “Joyful Life” Theme! Heck, my book that is scheduled to come out in December is titled “The Happiness Formula!” so I like to consider myself a carrier of joy to others.)
Here are 3 simple steps to help you add more joy into your daily life, so that you can feel peaceful, light and calm.
- Define Your Joy
My joy is probably not the same as your joy. Society leans on us to need certain things to be joyful, so you might think that you need to spend money and accumulate joy. This is not true. If you listen to your authentic self, and examine your true priorities you will easily find your Joy.
I had a client who thought her joy was with a certain boyfriend and in a certain joy. Although I could feel that this wasn’t the case for her, she was not ready to hear it. For several weeks I supported her as she discovered that her Joy had nothing to do with this man, and in fact, he was causing her pain and disrupting her Joy! She discovered her Joy was actually exercise, spending time with friends and taking good care of her spirit through reading and meditating.
I encourage you to take a few minutes and think about your life. Define what bring you lasting Joy. Create a list in a journal and… - Set Aside Time for Your Joy
You might be thinking that you don’t have time in your life to take long walks and meditate, and hey, if that isn’t your Joy, don’t do it! However, if your first thought to reading this is, “I don’t have time for this,” then you have a problem and you definitely need to set some time to discover your Joy because this is a major sign you’ve lost it!
There is no need to panic, you don’t need to spend 60 minutes in silence to feel joy (that’s why defining YOUR joy is so important). Start with 20 minutes per week. After a few weeks, add in another 2 minutes, and work your way up to 15 minutes a day (or more). I promise, when you start doing this, you won’t want to let it go. This time rejuvenates your spirit, and you will feel calm and secure, no matter what is going on around you. - Nourish Your Joy
This means take care of yourself when your struggling. Pull out that Joy List you wrote in step 1 and do some of them. I know when I feel stressed or start to panic, the first thing I do is ground myself…literally. I stand up, stretch and feel my feet on the floor. This brings me out of my head and into the reality that this is just a moment in time and it will pass. After that I might take my dog for a quick walk, or just step outside to breathe some fresh air. You could buy some flowers and admire them, open your favorite book to a random page and read the message there for you, email or call a friend, dance…whatever you need to do to reconnect with your spirit.
It doesn’t get much simpler than that. We like to make things complicated and get frustrated when simple things feel difficult. This is simple stuff. The hard part is taking the time out and making a priority to do it! It is like any new habit, it feels hard a first but with practice it becomes easier and soon it’s a part of your regular day and you don’t have to think twice.
Make a conscious effort to try it for a month and see how you feel. I bet you won’t want to go back!
Want to use this in your eZine or on your blog? Sure as long as you don’t change anything and include the following:
Grab your FREE Copy of “Dump The Junk, and Be Happy” eBook at http://kimberlyenglot.com. Kimberly Englot is CEO of The Center for Authentic Self Development. She is the courage you need to put yourself back on your priority list, without feeling guilty or selfish.
How to Guarantee a GREAT Day, Every Day
Guest post by Chris Widener
Every Monday morning I have a standing radio interview I enjoy very much. But you can imagine that it can become routine. To prevent this, the host doesn’t tell me the topic before we go live on the air—now that puts some excitement into it!
This week, he asked me: How can a person guarantee that they will have a great day, every day? Some may find that hard to answer, but for me it was easy. You see, I believe we can control our destinies and create for ourselves the kind of lives we desire. People who live based on these principles achieve what they desire, while people who live reacting to circumstances do not.
Here are the principles for having a GREAT day every day:
Focus on today only.
Yes, long-range goals are important. But our focus must be on today. My equation is that your short-term tasks, multiplied by time, equal your long-term accomplishments. With that in mind, it’s imperative that we focus on short-term because, when multiplied by time, it will eventually equal our long-term goals. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Make today the best day you have ever had. Realize that when you lay down to sleep tonight you will have just given up the only shot you will ever have at today. You only get one shot at your today, so focus intently on making it all that it possibly can be. Focus, focus, focus! When you focus on making today great, you are helping guarantee that you will make your day GREAT, every day!
Embrace your power to choose.
Dwight D. Eisenhower said, “The history of free men is never written by chance but by choice—their choice.” When your today becomes your yesterday, you will look back and realize that day was a result of your choices. “But wait Chris, what if my boss controlled my day? That isn’t my choice!” you might say. But it is your choice to work for someone else. You chose to let someone else tell you what to do. But you can control your own destiny. The moment we realize that we can exercise a powerful gift from God, namely the gift of free will and choice, is when we begin to create for ourselves a GREAT day each and every day! Take ownership of the direction of your life. Make your choices and carry them out!
Your attitude is up to you.
Yes, bad things may happen in your day. The pitcher for “Team Circumstances” may have a tremendous curveball waiting for you, and you cannot control that. You cannot control what others may do or say. But you can control your attitude. Your attitude about whatever happens to you is up to you.
When something happens to you, you have the choice: Will you let it get you down and depressed, keeping you from forging ahead and making the day the best one ever? Or will you say to yourself that, no matter what happens, you are on the path to success and no obstacle will keep you from it? Will you say, “Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose—I guess this time I lost”? Will you say, “Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn—I can really learn something from this!”?
It is all in what attitude you choose. Your attitude is up to you, and when you choose to have a great attitude, you are choosing to guarantee to have a GREAT day, every day!
Live out and act on your priorities.
So far, we have dealt with internal perspectives, and that is indeed the place to start. But the practical place is in our priorities. If we want to make our days great, then we have to live out those things that will by definition make our days great. And those things are what are important to us. They are our priorities.
So each morning, start out by asking, “What things are important to me today? What are the things I need to accomplish in order for me to lay down tonight and know that I lived a GREAT day?” Then put those in order of most important to least important.
Don’t do what is fun. Don’t do what is easy. Do what is IMPORTANT! Live out your priorities. When you do, you will guarantee that you will make your day GREAT, every day!
Tomorrow, when you wake up, go through the four following points and see if you don’t make tomorrow a GREAT day:
* Focus on today only.
* Understand that I get to choose how today will go.
* Remain in a positive attitude no matter what happens.
* Live out and act on my priorities.
Do this, and you will guarantee a GREAT day, every day.
About Chris Widener
Chris Widener is a businessman, author, speaker and television host. A prolific writer and producer of CDs and DVDs, his most recent book is The Art of Influence. Widener is the host of the national interview show, Made For Success, and co-host of True Performance with Zig Ziglar. The Chris Widener newsletter is one of the most widely distributed on personal and professional development. Chris’ motto is, “Turn your potential into performance, succeed in every area of life, and achieve your dreams.” He very definitely gives you the tools you need to do that and delivers results-oriented programs designed specifically to help you achieve your goals!
Read more posts from Chris HERE
Use your powers for good
Guilt.
It’s a dirty word in my realm, and for the last few years I rarely let it enter my experience. I don’t feel guilty about saying no (or saying yes, to the odd guilty pleasure). I don’t feel guilty about doing something I love, and I don’t feel guilty about taking “me time” when I need it.
I’m not perfect, but for the most part, I’ve eliminated guilt in every area of my life.
There is a lot of guilt around getting rid of guilt! I address this deeper in my Master Life Cleanse program, but essential we treat guilt as the price we pay for doing what we want.
Which brings me to my main point of this blog post:
You cannot possibly feel bad enough (or guilty enough) for someone else, to make THEM happy in the long term. Others do not grow because you shrink.
An example is the best way to illustrate my point. I have a client who makes a lot of money doing what she loves, and she feels guilty! She feels guilty that there are people out there without jobs, and guilty that she has a lot of material things, while others have very few. She even feels guilty about feeling guilty because she knows it’s a waste of time! To combat this guilt, I showed her that her feeling guilty did nothing to improve the circumstances of her friends and family, and a light-bulb turned on for her.
She “got it,” and realized that she could improve their lives by living hers to the fullest and being happy!
A funny thing happens when you’re happy (and you release guilt)…people want to know why. They gravitate towards you because you are nice to be around, and they start to feel better.
You are no good to anyone playing small, or not living your life to the fullest. Use your powers for good, don’t stunt them.
A favorite saying of mine:
“Better to light a candle, than curse the darkness”
Season 1 Episode 2
Dump The Junk: 3 Flabby Thinking Habits You Need to Tighten Up
Welcome to the second webisode of Authentic Self Expressions. If you have a FREE copy of Dump The Junk & Be Happy, you know how important mindset it to living a great life. Here, I explain 3 habits that can get you in trouble if you’re not aware of them.
HOW I dump the junk…and be happy
I have been talking A LOT about the importance “dumping the Junk” lately. Some of it has to do with the end of the Master LIFE Cleanse program, I always feel refreshed after teaching that course.
Part of it has to do with the need I see out there…people’s lives are still filled with JUNK! So I feel a personal responsibility to share my experiences with others. (Enter the Dump The Junk eBook, which is FREE, so you have no reason NOT to grab a copy, devour it and live it.)
In my Authentic Self Book Club meeting on Wednesday, one of the participants asked me how I was able to not let negative circumstances get to me. The short version of my answer is this:
I just don’t experience the negative in the same way that I used to. I’ve dumped the Junk, and become less magnetic to negative stuff (aka: Junk — sarcastic, angry people; guilt; anger; self doubt; debt). I just don’t physically or emotionally attract the stuff anymore.
Not that my life is perfect. Far from it! But I am living and experiencing a different life than I was 3 years ago. And it all stems from the effort I’ve been putting in to change how I am feeling and what I’m attracting. It takes effort, but done right, it feels effortless.
I’m not going to share how I Dumped MY Junk in this post, you can grab the free book for that, but I am going to share with you 3 of my favorite “happiness vibes” exercises.
These are the systems that I use to pull myself out of a funk when I notice I’m falling into one. And with time, I’ve managed to go from “flabby thinking” and letting my thoughts control my emotions with out my awareness, to being fit and fabulous! (Vibrationally, at least). These are the ways I did it.
Focus Wheel. This is an Abraham-Hicks Process and I’ve talked about it before. It’s just a wheel, with what I want in the center. I get “on” the wheel but stating a true, yet positive statement that feels good. After I get the first one (it’s the most difficult) the LoA takes care of the rest, flooding my system with more positive and true thoughts. By the time I’ve filled out the entire wheel, I am very close to feeling like I’ve already accomplished my goal in the center. And that puts me “into the vortex” to attract what I want, quicker and without a lot of effort.
The Wheel on the right is a quick example I created. It should give you the basic idea to help you get started with your own. NOTE: Do not put anything on the wheel that doesn’t make you feel good! Only positive thoughts are allowed.- Gratitudes (specific). After I’ve completed the Focus Wheel, I spend time coming up with 10 things that I am grateful for, specific to whatever I placed in the center of my wheel. (Example, if my Focus Wheel is all about feeling good and looking fit, I’d do 10 Gratitudes on how I already feel like a “thin” person).
- Rampage of Appreciation. After the the Gratitudes I do another Abe-Hicks Process. I sit and I just appreciate everything around me. This is like a broad Gratitude list. I appreciate the sun shining and my healthy, fat cat. I love the sweater I’m wearing, it feels so good, and the computer I’m writing at. I love the people I’ve come across and the paint on my walls. Love everything, but be honest. You’ll create a lot of dissonance (resistance) if you try to fake this.
Those are my Secret Weapons to happiness. And I do them daily. Get into a habit of setting aside 20 minutes each day to do the same and see how it becomes a habit to feel good…and see how you become less attractive to the Junk in life!
For those of you who are eZine subscribers, you already have my Dump The Junk & Be Happy eBook. Everyone else, you can get it here.
Want to use this article in your eZine or Blog? Just make no changes, and include the following:
Kimberly Englot is the President and Founder of the Center for Authentic Self Development. She is your source of courage so that you can put yourself back on your mile-long To-Do list WITHOUT feeling guilty or selfish. You can visit Kimberly, access her free blog posts, podcast archive and learn more about The Center for Authentic Self Development at http://kimberlyenglot.com/
It’s about the living of life!
As always, I asked…and was given.
I’ve been nervous about my upcoming 10k race that I’m running in 36 hours. May flew by in a flurry of live programs, book promotions, writing my own book and publishing an ebook. My birthday was somewhere in there too, and now I’m looking at running 6.24 miles in just over a day and thinking, “CRAP! I wish I’d made it a priority to train more.”
But there is no use spending a lot of time worrying or feeling guilty or beating myself up. That will do nothing but waste more valuable time and energy and vital life experience!
So I’ve been thinking, the last day or so, about how to change my attitude from dread to being happy just running/walking the 10k, rather than letting the competitive drive in me take over and punish myself for not working harder.
I got it. Just a few minutes ago. I was walking my dog in the rain, listening to some Abe-Hicks material (Tahiti ‘09) and Esther, channeling Abraham said
It’s like if you were running a marathon. (!!!! My ears completely perked up.) You don’t run the marathon for the reward at the end. (Really? That’s right!) You do it for the energy it gives you, and the feeling of completion, and the blood that flows through your body. You do it for the fun and the life experience.
And then she said something that really spoke to me
You didn’t come here to gather stuff, you can to align with life. This is about life. This is not about the doing of stuff, or the having of stuff.
BINGO! That was exactly what I needed to hear, and of course, I had to share it with you guys.
So there you have it. You’re not alive so that you can gather a bunch of toys, travel to exotic places and die. You are here, alive, to live your life! And that might mean that you gather lots of toys and travel to great places, but the important thing is that you’re alive and enjoying every minute of it.
For me, that translates into getting up at 5am, to run/walk 10 km along the beautiful river, likely in the rain, with my husband right beside me. If my time is in the 70-75 minute range, considering the training I did (or the lack of!), that’s fantastic. Otherwise, I’m just going along for the weather, the view and the company! Oh, and the really nice Adidas t-shirt that I get for registering
So, now I’m going to lace up my runners and grab my mp3 player…my treadmill is calling my name!
