Do positive thinkers need to grow up and get real?
I had an outstanding day yesterday. One of the many things that made me so happy:
I bought a new printer a few days ago, and had to take it back. When I took it back to exchange it for one that didn’t jam up every time I tried to print, I actually was given money back. Yep, the printer had since gone on sale and I exchanged it for a new one, plus they gave me money in return! I felt so much better after 2 days of a stupid printer that didn’t work. NOTICE, that is all about my perspective on that outcome? (I could have been angry, yelled at the customer service agent, demanded my money back, went to another store and purchased a similar printer for more money. That is probably how I would have acted a few years ago.)
So, I had a good day. This morning I woke up to find someone had commented on one of my blog posts…YAY! I thought, I am uplifted whenever anyone takes the time to comment. But this was a TROLL. Yikes. Yuck. Ick. 
I sent the comment to the trash because I don’t need anyone smearing ME with THEIR “junk” but basically I was told that I was naive and “to grow up.” (The issue was a post I wrote about the power of positive, group thinking, comparing it to a Criss Angel episode I watched 6 months ago).
In the last 2 or 3 years I have discovered that (GASP) I feel better, happier, safer, freer when I believe that positive forces rule/fuel the world. I am happier when I CHOOSE to see the positive aspects of my life, and the examples in it. Do I believe everything anyone tells me? No. I am the first to check out www.Snopes.comwhenever I’m sent a crazy email. Do I believe everything that Criss Angel (a paid illusionist) does is pure and real? No, but at that point in my life I was searching for a sign, and I think I got one. Does that make me naive? Maybe in some people’s eyes.
I the end I am happy and my family is happy. What else matters? I am going to continue choosing to absorb the positive vibes of those around me, and deflect the negative ones. There is enough “junk” in this world, and I have my own to deal with, I don’t need yours! (And you don’t need mine).
I’m Not living up to my full potential!
Byron Katie is a very loving soul, can’t you just feel it?
In this video, she helps a man through some self-sabotaging beliefs and I have a feeling that he’s not the only one who’s ever worried about this!
Identifying Self Sabotage part 4
Here is the last of the 4 part Installments I promised. Review parts 1, 2, & 3 and see how often you’re allowing your “but” to get in your own way.
4. Resentment.
“I should…”
Very similar to guilt, and resentment ties right back into fear again. You’re afraid if you don’t do something you will receive a negative consequence. So you are continually living your life according to someone else’s rules.
“Nice girls are agreeable.”
“I should say yes, even when I don’t want to.”
“My sister’s kids have tutors.”
Which means you are on a lot of committee and volunteering for causes that you don’t truly care about, simply because you don’t want to say no. Or, you spend a lot of money trying to keep up appearances and do/say/wear the right things.
It’s exhausting and unnecessary. When you identify and clean out this toxic thinking habits, you are happier and have more room for the health and wellness you are actually looking for.
These habits are incredibly common so don’t beat yourself up for feeling this way. Instead, work on being aware that they exist. Notice them when they creep in, and how they are working against you.
Over time, awareness will make all of them disappear, but this will take practice like any other new skill. If you feel overwhelmed already (and this can be a daunting process to do alone) or want more information make sure you check out my Master Life Cleanse: Mindset Makeover. It lays out limiting beliefs, fear, worry, anger, guilt and Automatic Negative Thoughts in great detail, as well as giving you exact exercises to help you deal with the mindset saboteurs that are keeping you stuck!
I know that many of you are also dealing with money worries, which is a huge limiting belief. But I don’t want that limiting belief to get in the way of you busting out of that tiny box of “safe” and “comfortable” (and stuck) that you’ve been stuck in for so long so until July 21, 2010 I have a 5-pay option for my Mindset Makeover kit. You can take your time to pay, while you shift the mindset junk holding you back in life.
You can buy the Mindset Makeover for $147.
The $30 5-pay option is for those of you who still have money concerns. (5 pays for this kind of product are unheard of, but I never said I followed the crowd 
) but the 5-PAY is ONLY available until JULY 21, 2010. After that, you can no longer pay for it in installments.
The Master Life Cleanse: Mindset Makeover System
This Mini-Makeover combines the Automatic Negative Thoughts, Self-Sabotage / Limiting Beliefs and the Guilt, Worry, Anger and Fear mindsets that hold you back from greatness! If you’re ready to clear out the negative thinking that is holding you back, it’s time for a mindset makeover.
You Will Learn :
~ A simple exercise to uncover your ANTs and false beliefs
~ The ONLY 2 ways you can deal with ANTs to get them out of your life for good
~ The 3 Steps to identify your true fears (they may not be what you think they are)
~ 5 Strategies you can do to immediately shift from “I can’t” to “I can”
Paid in Full: $147
Or choose the $30 5-Pay Option
I know you’re going to love this! Between the action guide (that covers the entire Master LIFE Cleanse program) and the 3 teleseminars you are going to flip at all the unique (and simple) ways you can identify your limiting beliefs and leave self sabotage FAR FAR behind you! Add it to your cart now, before you forget and get started on this process immediately!
What people have said about my Master Life Cleanse Program
Here is a testimonial from one my my Spring 2010 Master LIFE Cleanse:Happiness & Harmony participants.
“I started a business in 2010 and knew that I would do what I needed to do in order to succeed. I also knew that I would benefit from coaching. Enter Kim! and her wonderful Master Life Cleanse program. One of the biggest hurdles for me has been procrastination. I could spend endless time planning, making lists or thinking about what I should do, but not actually doing it. Since I participated in the MLC , I have been so much more productive. I have been able to complete information for my website, make networking phone calls and even put up a page on Facebook. Three of the really big things I got out of the MLC was clarity, clarity and clarity. The steps to this were so clear and concise and have been life changing for me. There were many terms that Kim came up with to describe a particular process. My favourite without a doubt is “Success Rituals” which refers to specific activities to assist with getting you in the frame of mind to work on any particular project with success. Thank you for your beautiful spirit and the work that you do.”
Joanne Klaassen
Winnipeg, Canada
After the Spring 2009 Master Life Cleanse, Kaitrece wrote me a long, beautiful letter. This is just part of it, you can read the rest HERE.
“…After the Life Cleanse, I felt refreshed and free. Free to Be. To move. To Start. To Act. I felt ‘clear’ – and I was. I’d walked through key areas and had the opportunity to make a fresh assessment of where I was and recommit to healthier, more self-affirming choices in my life. When you clear out the past, you free yourself, and in the process, you become trained to hear your own voice more clearly. Your Authentic Voice. When you can hear your Authentic Voice, its so much easier to make Authentic choices and find your Authentic Purpose – that gift you have to offer the world that is a unique expression of You. No one else can do what each of us has been set here to do.
The biggest thing I took away from the Master Life Cleanse was something that I’d learned years before, but had lost the habit of practicing in my daily life. I learned to be aware of the ‘inner critic’ and listen in a more powerful way to the negative self-talk that we all hear but don’t always notice.
Today, I’ve gotten clear on what I feel passionate about and how I can package that into services I can offer in the marketplace. I hired a Business Coach to help me create the business & results I really want in my life. I’ve selected a business name, filed for my DBA, registered my domain name and am now mapping out my site, systems and processes to launch my business. I’m really happy with how far I’ve come and am grateful to Kimberly for her guidance and continued support and cheerleading through the process!”
Kaitrece Fort
Riverside, CA, U.S.A
www.InlandBusinessTechnology.com
Identifying Self Sabotage part 3
Here is the third part of the 4 part Installments I promised.
Part one: “Self doubt and Limiting Beliefs”
Part two: “Fear/worry”
3. Shame/Guilt.
“I’m not worth it.” “I’m not a good person if I put myself first.”
They’re both the same thing and they’re both related to fear. You are telling yourself that you don’t deserve success, health, wealth unless everyone else around you has it too. You are trying to control everyone else’s happiness, which is impossible. What you focus on you get more of, so if you are trying to make everyone ELSE happy you will end up making them happy and you will be drained and overwhelmed.
Another example: You want more money. So you are focusing on having MORE money, which really means you don’t feel like you have enough. So you are actually focusing on NOT ENOUGH…which brings you situations where you feel lack and not enough. Make sense?
Guilt makes you feel selfish for wanting more. Guilt makes you put other people’s needs and wants ahead of your own. Guilt keeps you tired, old-looking and sick.
If you find yourself continually putting someone else first, you are sabotaging your success. If you can find the money to put your children in yet another art class or on a sports team, you can find the money to join a yoga retreat, just for you. Don’t let the guilt of not giving everything to everyone else prevent you from enjoying your own life.
Guilt is a HUGE waste of the present moment. And it’s a really bad habit (like paying for something over and over and over again). Pay once and let it go!!! It can be tempting to just not bother, after all, you’ve survived this long, right? But if you’re interested in thriving, not just surviving, if you need extra help identifying your limiting fears my Mindset Makeover will help.
Right now add the the Mindset Makeover to your cart for $147. Or choose the $30 5-Pay Option
The $30 5-pay option is for those of you who still have money concerns. (5 pays for this kind of product are unheard of, but I never said I followed the crowd ) but the 5-PAY is ONLY available until JULY 21, 2010. After that, you can no longer pay for it in installments. Learn more about this HERE.
I know you’re going to love this! Between the action guide (that covers the entire Master LIFE Cleanse program) and the 3 teleseminars you are going to flip at all the unique (and simple) ways you can identify your limiting beliefs and leave self sabotage FAR FAR behind you! Add it to your cart now, before you forget and get started on this process immediately!
Identifying Self Sabotage part 2
Here is the second part of the 4 part Installments I promised.
Part one: “Self doubt and Limiting Beliefs”
2. Fear/worry.
“What if…”
Again, meant to keep you “safe” and comfortable, fear and worry are holding you back. If you examined the things you are worrying about, 90% of them will never happen. Of those things that do happen, the anticipation is usually worse than the actual event. It is incredibly silly to spend valuable time and energy worrying about something that will not happen. Why not put that energy into living in the moment and valuing everything you already have, instead of worrying about losing it?
Most common fear is fear of failure. A common story you tell yourself might look like,
“What if I apply for a promotion and don’t get it? What if my boss things I’m crazy to even think I’m valuable enough to apply? What if he sits in his office and laughs at my application? Then I won’t get it and my family will be disappointed. My kids will never get into college and my retirement fund will suffer. My parents will never be proud of my and I will be stuck in the same house driving the same rust-bucket car forever! I can’t handle the rejection. I just won’t apply.”
The problem with these kinds of fears is that they hold you back, so you create a self-fulfilling prophecy. You don’t want the rejection of NOT getting the promotion, so you don’t apply. Doesn’t really make rational sense, does it?
But most of these self sabotaguers DON’T make sense rationally, but they are working because if they didn’t work on some level you wouldn’t do them. This can be confusing and overwhelming to do by yourself. It can be tempting to just not bother, after all, you’ve survived this long, right? But if you’re interested in thriving, not just surviving, if you need extra help identifying your limiting fears my Mindset Makeover will help.
Right now add the the Mindset Makeover to your cart for $147. Or choose the $30 5-Pay Option
The $30 5-pay option is for those of you who still have money concerns. (5 pays for this kind of product are unheard of, but I never said I followed the crowd ) but the 5-PAY is ONLY available until JULY 21, 2010. After that, you can no longer pay for it in installments. Learn more about this HERE.
I know you’re going to love this! Between the action guide (that covers the entire Master LIFE Cleanse program) and the 3 teleseminars you are going to flip at all the unique (and simple) ways you can identify your limiting beliefs and leave self sabotage FAR FAR behind you! Add it to your cart now, before you forget and get started on this process immediately!
Byron Katie–I’m too fat
A friend of mine shared these videos a couple of months ago and I resonated so strongly with them that I knew I had to share with you. Of course I forgot about them until recently when I realized that they were a perfect fit for my upcoming Happiness & Self Premium Membership call (these videos also go very nicely with several topics in my “Letting Go” Premium Series, starting in August.) I invite you to join us as we discuss self esteem, self love and self discovery on July 19! Learn more at http://kimberlyenglot.com/being-the-perfect-sized-you/
Talk about getting it…You are the perfect sized YOU!!!
If you are unhappy regarding your own physical appearance, take the time to watch these videos! Take to heart what Katie has to say. (Part 2 is my favorite–“You’re not too fat to be you…and in a perfect Universe, someone has to be you!” Love it!!!– but make sure you watch Part 1 first or it won’t make as much sense)
Byron Katie: I’m too fat. Parts 1 & 2
Let It Go…
Based on feedback I got from my latest How Can I Help You? survey, I’ve created the next series for the Premium Membership calls (view previous call topics here)! I noticed a lot of people are struggling with fear and being weighed down (figuratively and literally). Most wanted more information on being happy with their bodies, as well as letting go of being afraid of what other people think….so to combat those predicaments, I’m creating the Let It Go series! 
Release yourself from the prison of:
- Worrying about what other people think of you (learn that it’s none of your business)
- Believing what your inner critic is yelling, (don’t believe everything you think)
- Needing utter perfection in your life so that you can continue the facade of happiness (no Martha Stewart’s allowed)
More details will come in the coming months, but starting in August 2010, Premium Members are guaranteed to learn how to let the junk go! See the basics below.
4 Part Series: Let It Go!
- … What other’s think. How to stop caring and start living!
- … Excess weight. How to finally be happy where you are, and watch the weight fall off as a “side-effect”!
- …“Emotional baggage.” How to release the “junk” you’ve accumulated from past heart-ache, disappointment and failure.
- … Perfection. When and where “good enough” is good enough!
If you’re interested in ANY of the topics above and need information you can quickly and easily apply to your own life, make sure you stop by the Premium Membership page and check out exactly what Premium Membership means for you and how you can join us for less than a fast-food meal each month! (Hurry so you don’t miss out on that Charter Members pricing, the monthly fee WILL GO UP).
Identifying Self Sabotage Part 1
Self sabotage is something that everyone deals with at some point in life. It becomes a problem when you continually let fear, worry, and self doubt take over your dreams and then look back and regret it.
It is perfectly natural for you to have fear and worry, these are meant to keep you safe and from acting in a way that could harm you and your tribe. These feelings go all the way back to cave days, when failing to consider “what if” and be on high alert meant a saber-tooth tiger might have you for dinner.
Fear serves it purpose sometimes, but most people let it take over and are fearful of situations that aren’t actually risky. Don’t get me wrong, you have to seriously consider all aspects of a major decision before you leap into it, but too much thinking allows the fear to take over and will hold you back.
I could break self-saboteurs down into great detail, but in the end they’re all virtually related so I’ve identified 4 main categories, that I will share with you over the next week, to help you understand what is holding you back from your dreams. Next time you have to make a decision, listen to your internal dialogue and see what you can “hear” yourself saying.
-
Self doubt and limiting beliefs.
“Because I have failed in the past, I will fail again so why bother.”
Because of something in your past, you’ve learned to play it safe. The base cause of limiting beliefs (and everything else that holds you back) is irrational fear. It isn’t necessary for you to have direct experience with these beliefs in order for them to corrupt you. For example, if you grew up without a lot of money you may have heard your parents claiming that poverty was more virtuous that wealth and you hold the belief that money is evil, without actually experience wealth.
“I can’t start my own business because I’ve never done it before.”
“I don’t deserve to feel good.”
“Money brings out the worst in people.”
“Asking for help means I’m weak.”
Those are some very broad, very common limiting beliefs.
That is the first of the four. I was overwhelmed with responses to my How Can I Help You survey, and it was very, very clear to me that the thing people are concerned about most is understanding, identifying and preventing their self-sabotaging behaviors. There was also a big concern about money and not having enough. I’ve tried to incorporate as much information as I can in this four part blog series, but if you want a more step-by-step process with exact tools and techniques to get you moving faster than you would on your own, I won’t leave you hanging.
From my Master LIFE Cleanse program I have created mini-makeovers. My favorite one is the Mindset Makeover Program and because I promised to listen to you, it is the best way to get you out of your small comfortable box and into happiness, health and wealth!
You can buy the Mindset Makeover for $147.
I’ve also created a $30 5-pay option for those of you who still have money concerns. (5 pays for this kind of product are unheard of, but I never said I followed the crowd ) but the 5-PAY is ONLY available until JULY 21, 2010. After that, you can no longer pay for it in installments.
The Master Life Cleanse: Mindset Makeover System
This Mini-Makeover combines the Automatic Negative Thoughts, Self-Sabotage / Limiting Beliefs and the Guilt, Worry, Anger and Fear mindsets that hold you back from greatness! If you’re ready to clear out the negative thinking that is holding you back, it’s time for a mindset makeover.
You Will Learn :
~ A simple exercise to uncover your ANTs and false beliefs
~ The ONLY 2 ways you can deal with ANTs to get them out of your life for good
~ The 3 Steps to identify your true fears (they may not be what you think they are)
~ 5 Strategies you can do to immediately shift from “I can’t” to “I can”
Paid in Full: $147
Or choose the $30 5-Pay Option
I know you’re going to love this! Between the action guide (that covers the entire Master LIFE Cleanse program) and the 3 teleseminars you are going to flip at all the unique (and simple) ways you can identify your limiting beliefs and leave self sabotage FAR FAR behind you! Add it to your cart now, before you forget and get started on this process immediately!
What people have said about my Master Life Cleanse Program
Here is a testimonial from one my my Spring 2010 Master LIFE Cleanse:Happiness & Harmony participants.
“I started a business in 2010 and knew that I would do what I needed to do in order to succeed. I also knew that I would benefit from coaching. Enter Kim! and her wonderful Master Life Cleanse program. One of the biggest hurdles for me has been procrastination. I could spend endless time planning, making lists or thinking about what I should do, but not actually doing it. Since I participated in the MLC , I have been so much more productive. I have been able to complete information for my website, make networking phone calls and even put up a page on Facebook. Three of the really big things I got out of the MLC was clarity, clarity and clarity. The steps to this were so clear and concise and have been life changing for me. There were many terms that Kim came up with to describe a particular process. My favourite without a doubt is “Success Rituals” which refers to specific activities to assist with getting you in the frame of mind to work on any particular project with success. Thank you for your beautiful spirit and the work that you do.”
Joanne Klaassen
Winnipeg, Canada
After the Spring 2009 Master Life Cleanse, Kaitrece wrote me a long, beautiful letter. This is just part of it, you can read the rest HERE.
“…After the Life Cleanse, I felt refreshed and free. Free to Be. To move. To Start. To Act. I felt ‘clear’ – and I was. I’d walked through key areas and had the opportunity to make a fresh assessment of where I was and recommit to healthier, more self-affirming choices in my life. When you clear out the past, you free yourself, and in the process, you become trained to hear your own voice more clearly. Your Authentic Voice. When you can hear your Authentic Voice, its so much easier to make Authentic choices and find your Authentic Purpose – that gift you have to offer the world that is a unique expression of You. No one else can do what each of us has been set here to do.
The biggest thing I took away from the Master Life Cleanse was something that I’d learned years before, but had lost the habit of practicing in my daily life. I learned to be aware of the ‘inner critic’ and listen in a more powerful way to the negative self-talk that we all hear but don’t always notice.
Today, I’ve gotten clear on what I feel passionate about and how I can package that into services I can offer in the marketplace. I hired a Business Coach to help me create the business & results I really want in my life. I’ve selected a business name, filed for my DBA, registered my domain name and am now mapping out my site, systems and processes to launch my business. I’m really happy with how far I’ve come and am grateful to Kimberly for her guidance and continued support and cheerleading through the process!”
Kaitrece Fort
Riverside, CA, U.S.A
www.InlandBusinessTechnology.com
Season 1 Episode 2
Dump The Junk: 3 Flabby Thinking Habits You Need to Tighten Up
Welcome to the second webisode of Authentic Self Expressions. If you have a FREE copy of Dump The Junk & Be Happy, you know how important mindset it to living a great life. Here, I explain 3 habits that can get you in trouble if you’re not aware of them.
5 Easy Ways to feel really good (and inspire others)
I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.
Edward Everett Hale
Isn’t that inspirational?
I was pondering about what to write today and I thought to myself, QUOTES! People love them and I’m always digging up fantastic ones that I am dying to share. This one was the first one that spoke to me when I opened up my “Quote Journal” this morning.
And it got me thinking about simple things that you can do to increase your happiness (and sense of fulfillment) and also inspire others.
I’ve come up with a short list. I challenge you to do a couple and see how you feel afterward.
- Donate unused “clutter” to your local Salvation Army or charity shop. You will help out others who would find use for it AND make room for good stuff to come into your life. (I don’t understand how this works, but it does!)
- Donate ALL your shoes! I got this from Sonia Choquette. She said that when you feel you need to start from the ground up, literally do it! Give away all your shoes and start fresh. What a great way to re energize your life. I don’t know if I’ll give away all my shoes, but I can certainly start with the ones I don’t use. I might even give away some I love, just to push my comfort zone. AND it’s a great excuse to buy new ones!
- Look for happiness. Wake up each morning and say, “I can’t wait to see what special thing will happen to me today.” When you think this out loud, and get into the habit of looking for it, you’ll find that your perspective broadens and you’ll experience more happiness. I have a personal example.
Nikki, the newest Englot family member!
I just learned this technique on Monday, and I REALLY didn’t want to get out of bed this morning. It was a dreary morning, I was looking at snow on the ground…I just wanted to pull the covers back over my head. Even the lure of delicious coffee wasn’t working. So I thought, “What special thing will happen to me today? I have to get out of bed to see!” And I forced my butt out…the first thing I did was check my email (Yes, I’m sick!) and there sitting in my inbox was my “special thing.” My husband and I were approved to adopt a puppy! My day completely changed and I have been soaring high ever since!
You will look forward to the day, if you’re out there searching for something to be happy about! - Call up someone you’ve been thinking about, but haven’t gotten around to talking to in a while. I’m talking about a family member, friend or past client here. If you listen to your intuition, I’ll bet you’ll find that this person really needed to hear your voice, even if they don’t tell you so. I have had countless experiences where I’ve thought of someone out of the blue. I decided to email, or call, only to have them go, “You have the strangest ability to know EXACTLY when I need someone.” It doesn’t take long and it can make a huge difference in someone’s life.
- Last one…and the easiest, post an inspirational quote to Twitter or Facebook — something that “calls” you. Just do a Google search for quotes. Thousands of pages will come up, and reading through them will pick up your mood (Hey, I have an entire book that I’ve written of them) and when you find one and share it, it will boost someone else’s mood too!
